It’s official, Boytactics has started school this year. With this new milestone, I have come to realize my mistake in doing so much for him, rather than letting him do it himself. Part of this came from me thinking of him as my little boy, but most came from the fact that I am a control freak, and it actually pains me to watch him try things on his own. Not for fear he can’t do it, I know he can. Rather because watching him try things like open a board game, or open his snack or even trying to pull his own pants up, take a painful amount of time. I am all about time management, and efficiency, and did I mention I’m a control freak?
Today I could actually feel sweat forming on my brow, as I encouraged him to try just a little harder to get his foot in that last running shoe, the whole time glancing at the clock, knowing that even though we started this process 5 minutes early, we were still not going to make it out the door on time. Oh yeah, I should mention I hate being late. Let me be clear, it really does not bother me when others are late, just me. However I am working on that with the help of my sweet little boy! We are late for a lot of things now….!
Each day I encourage and guide Boytactics to do more things on his own, all the while forcing myself not to help. The pain I feel from wanting to get it done in a more timely fashion, quickly evaporates when I see the joy that lights up his face when he has accomplished something new on his own.
We are both making progress each day, him learning to do new things and building confidence in himself, and me taking the time to enjoy the little things, even if it does take a few extra minutes!